A Day In The Life
I had lunch with my friend A the other day, and she asked me, "Why do I hear the parents of newborns always talking about how tired and sleep-deprived they are? I mean, I know the baby's up at night, but what about when he's asleep? What do you do that takes up so much time?"
So I thought I'd chronicle the daily activities of the first month here.
1 day = 24 hours. It looks like so much!
First, you have to eat and go to the bathroom at a minimum. Showering and toothbrushing are nice too, and changing clothes when you've been peed or spit up on. Allocate a minimum of two hours for all of that, though I find everything takes longer with a baby in one arm; I tried to put him down this morning and had my breakfast prep/eating interrupted three times for crying, soothing, and diaper changes.
22 hours left...
6-10 hours average for breastfeeding. 6-12 times a day, for about an hour each time, with burping, changes, etc. You can pump, but with sterilizing and storage time, it takes almost as long. If you're pumping and bottlefeeding, like I am right now (literally... I'm typing with my right hand, pumping with my left, and bouncing his bouncy chair with my foot), double that time. Average 8 hours a day, minimum - the equivalent of your full-time job.
14 hours left...
Allocate another 2 hours minimum for cleaning up after baby and self. Restocking diaper supplies, taking out diaper pail, returning dishes to the kitchen and washing them, using the Roomba, doing laundry (oh my God so much laundry), putting away books and blankets and slings and the Boppy and extra clothes after use, refilling water bottles, sorting mail, dog care, etc. It's ridiculous how much time this takes, cumulatively, but it does - I did it before, too, but not in 5-minute increments between crises while carrying a 9-pound weight - that makes a difference.
12 hours left...
This is the most variable factor, but for the first month, I would guess an average of 3 hours for other baby care - soothing, bouncing, going for walks with a fussmonster, holding him while he sleeps on you because he grizzles whenever you put him down, reading/singing, diaper changes between feedings, baths, pediatrician visits, runs to the drugstore for meds/diapers/etc.
9 hours left...
Now, fit your social life, residual work complications, correspondence, time with your spouse, other errands, grocery shopping, personal grooming, bill paying, time with your pets, etc. into the remaining time. Sure, you can multi-task some of these things (socialize while breastfeeding, cook/clean while bouncing, sing while changing, etc.) but by the same token, all these estimates are minimums or averages - many days they take more time, so it probably cancels out the multitasking time savings. Oh, and sleep, can't forget sleep. Just fit that in in the one and two-hour time blocks that are left...Himself gives me a three or four hour chunk each evening (on top of his current 12-14 hour workday, so he's exhausted too), which can mean up to six straight hours of sleep, and will also mean that once we are over our current breastfeeding difficulties, I may be able to find a bit more time - though the Squid is ever more wakeful and needful as he grows, so we'll see.
We're into month 2 now - I may do an accounting of the next two months as I go as well.. if I can find time! Just finished pumping, and he's starting to wake up...thus ends even 1-handed typing time.
1 day = 24 hours. It looks like so much!
First, you have to eat and go to the bathroom at a minimum. Showering and toothbrushing are nice too, and changing clothes when you've been peed or spit up on. Allocate a minimum of two hours for all of that, though I find everything takes longer with a baby in one arm; I tried to put him down this morning and had my breakfast prep/eating interrupted three times for crying, soothing, and diaper changes.
22 hours left...
6-10 hours average for breastfeeding. 6-12 times a day, for about an hour each time, with burping, changes, etc. You can pump, but with sterilizing and storage time, it takes almost as long. If you're pumping and bottlefeeding, like I am right now (literally... I'm typing with my right hand, pumping with my left, and bouncing his bouncy chair with my foot), double that time. Average 8 hours a day, minimum - the equivalent of your full-time job.
14 hours left...
Allocate another 2 hours minimum for cleaning up after baby and self. Restocking diaper supplies, taking out diaper pail, returning dishes to the kitchen and washing them, using the Roomba, doing laundry (oh my God so much laundry), putting away books and blankets and slings and the Boppy and extra clothes after use, refilling water bottles, sorting mail, dog care, etc. It's ridiculous how much time this takes, cumulatively, but it does - I did it before, too, but not in 5-minute increments between crises while carrying a 9-pound weight - that makes a difference.
12 hours left...
This is the most variable factor, but for the first month, I would guess an average of 3 hours for other baby care - soothing, bouncing, going for walks with a fussmonster, holding him while he sleeps on you because he grizzles whenever you put him down, reading/singing, diaper changes between feedings, baths, pediatrician visits, runs to the drugstore for meds/diapers/etc.
9 hours left...
Now, fit your social life, residual work complications, correspondence, time with your spouse, other errands, grocery shopping, personal grooming, bill paying, time with your pets, etc. into the remaining time. Sure, you can multi-task some of these things (socialize while breastfeeding, cook/clean while bouncing, sing while changing, etc.) but by the same token, all these estimates are minimums or averages - many days they take more time, so it probably cancels out the multitasking time savings. Oh, and sleep, can't forget sleep. Just fit that in in the one and two-hour time blocks that are left...Himself gives me a three or four hour chunk each evening (on top of his current 12-14 hour workday, so he's exhausted too), which can mean up to six straight hours of sleep, and will also mean that once we are over our current breastfeeding difficulties, I may be able to find a bit more time - though the Squid is ever more wakeful and needful as he grows, so we'll see.
We're into month 2 now - I may do an accounting of the next two months as I go as well.. if I can find time! Just finished pumping, and he's starting to wake up...thus ends even 1-handed typing time.
4 Comments:
You didn't deck her? I think I would have.
Second comment -- I was just reading a friend's blog about the many hours of work and activity she's been doing and I thought hm, no kids, lives alone, she has no idea just how much you can cram into a week...
She was honestly curious, not snotty, so I didn't mind - I didn't really know how it all broke down before either!
They say you get more efficient as time goes on...I look forward to it! I was already a heavy multitasker, though...
The double-headed pump is the only way to go.
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